Viggo turned to Orlando, half-smile on his face. "Well, that's too bad. And here I was planning the wedding." He turned, ignoring the cameras flashing around them. "Hey, Karl!" he called. "Orlando and I are off." "Sorry to hear that," Karl remarked, smirking. "I had the perfect dress picked out, too. Made me look like a real lady." "That's an insult to ladies everywhere," Miranda called breezily as she passed them. Karl laughed at her retreating back. "When I meet one, I'll be sure to ask!" Orlando just glared at Karl and Viggo. "Sod off, the both of you." "Now, now, you're the one that broke it off," Viggo admonished. Orlando just punched him in the arm. "And abusive, too. It's a wonder I stayed with you as long as I did. You think Oprah or Rosie would have us?" "Didn't she cancel her show?" "Hmm...good point." Karl simply shook his head, clapped them both on the back. "Let me know if I need to go get my shotgun, force him to the altar," he said to Viggo, winking. "You're a good friend." Karl grinned. "I'll leave the two of you to work this out." Viggo smiled as Karl walked off. "See. He thinks we should be together." "Oh, get serious for a moment, would you?" "What? I am serious. I really think we could get backing on this. Abusive Elf and Empowered Heir of Gondor have it out on the next installment of "As Middle Earth Turns." Orlando's lips curved. "That's such a cliché." "Hey, you're the one that brought it up." Elijah bounced up a minute later, all wide-eyes and wider grin. "Karl tells me the two of you are getting married?" "Stop acting so shocked. Not very PC of you, is it?" Viggo asked, throwing an arm around Orlando's shoulders. "He's finally decided to make an honest man out of me." "You were never honest." Elijah just clamped his hand over his mouth, gaped at them. "You two aren't serious!" "He's mocking the love, Vig." Orlando sighed dramatically, turned his head deeper into Viggo's shoulder to hide his smile. "That's alright, we just won't invite him to the wedding." "What wedding?" Dom popped his sucker out of his mouth, waved it between the three of them as he walked up. "No secret pow-wows without me, eh." "Of course not. I've got to have a best man, don't I?" Orlando asked, grinning cheekily. "True, that you do. Always thought I'd make a better bridesmaid, though," Dom mused thoughtfully, tapping on his chin. "Nah, Billy's got better legs than you." Elijah shook his head in mock despair. "You guys are totally fucked, you know that?" "He's mocking us again." "And just when I was ready to pop over to Ted Casablanca and announce it," Viggo said. "You think we'd make the cover of People for this?" "It's possible," Dom mused. "What's with all of the publicity? What if I don't want to be on the cover of People?" "Orlando, are you trying to say you're ashamed of our love?" "Um, not as such..." "Alright then." Viggo turned again, arm still firmly around Orlando, smiling for the cameras. "Hey, Bernard, you think you could schedule in a wedding later on?" Bernard stopped, pretended to think. "Sorry, chaps, I've got some heavy drinking to do tonight. Perhaps tomorrow after tea?" "We've got that interview," Dom reminded him. "Ah, yes, terribly spotty of me. Wednesday next? Who's the happy couple?" "We are." Viggo hugged Orlando's shoulders for emphasis. "Even though I'm not in love with him," Orlando clarified. "The best couples aren't," Bernard stated. "Wednesday next, then, 2 sharp, wear something festive." "Well, that settles that, then." Viggo clapped Orlando on the back, looped his camera-strap more securely around his wrist. "Next Wednesday. Don't stand me up." He walked away without a backward glance. "Wouldn't dream of it." Orlando hooked his arm around Dom's. "Come on, we've got a wedding to plan. Vows, flowers, all that." "Red roses. Dozens." Dom bobbed his head, sucker firmly lodged in one cheek. "I'll plan the music." Elijah trotted after them. "You guys really aren't doing this? Are you? Guys? Guys...?" Onto Twu Wuv
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