Title: "Prima Nocta" Pairing: Harry Sinclair/Karl Urban Rating: PG Disclaimer: Never happened. Summary: Harry's dreams are getting worse. Notes: The idea, warped as it is, came from this post about Harry getting married. Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here today... Are you sure you want to do this? Karl's voice was a slither of sex and sin, spilling along Harry's spine in a heated caress. Marriage should be sacred, not an escape. I have to. Harry shuddered; blocked the moan. Begging never did any good. I can't keep... Shhhh... Karl's tongue flickered as Harry's voice broke. You don't have to say anything. I know. The sigh was vibrated out of him; Karl's fingers felt like brands on his skin. But if I don't now, I never will. When he woke up, alone and desperate, he could still hear Karl's dark laughter in his ears. ...To witness the union between these two people... Are you sure you want to do this, Harry? Her voice was honey-soft, concerned, as she wrapped supple arms around him. He couldn't stop shivering. I don't mind living in sin, you know. I have to. If I don't...I'll never be free. Her kiss brushed the corner of his mouth, smooth as silk and as cool as water; he felt like he might drown from the taste. You already know you'll never be free. No matter what. When he woke up, alone and aching, the sheets were soaked in the stale scent of sweat and the faint flower of her perfume. ...It is, therefore, not something to be entered into lightly or unadvisedly... Please try to understand. Harry knew the plea would fall on deaf ears; knew and did it anyway, because there was nothing left to lose. He'd damned himself a long time ago. I need this. I need peace. I understand that you're betraying me. Betraying us. Never. I would never... The words stuck in his throat, lodged with regret, dissonant with the jagged edges of despair. The words stuck because he knew they were true. He had to betray them to save himself. If it wasn't too late already. He couldn't go on like this. It has to end. I'm sorry. When Harry woke up, alone and desolate, he wanted to rage against the fates for what was to come. ...If any person can show just cause why they may not be joined together – let them speak now... I object. Harry screamed the words internally with everything in him. The shout shook the very foundation of his soul. He couldn't stand here another moment, stand here and pretend. Pretend his soul was his own, pretend he was whole. But he had to. He must. There was no choice. I object. The whisper was filled with the acid bile of his own inertia. I... I knew you would. Karl sounded sure of himself, smug in his superiority. So certain that it would come to this. So certain of Harry's answer. Come with me. Karl held out his hand; Harry could feel the heat of it in his bones. He thought he might burn to ash from the flames. When he woke up, alone and resolute, he knew what he had to do. If you enjoyed this fic, please leave feedback here. Thanks!