Harry stepped inside, drank in the sight of Karl, who stared back out of wary, guarded eyes. He wanted nothing more than to erase the distance. "So, talk," Karl said, running a hand through dark hair. Start with the truth. "I'm not whole without you." Harry held his breath, waiting. "You're not whole with me, either." Harry spread his hands apart, opened himself to everything. "Yeah, I am. I was just afraid to admit it." "And now you're not.' Harry stepped closer, a gut reaction to the hope in Karl's voice. "No. I'm not." * * * Harry's courage faltered the second he got to the door. He couldn't do it. It was better not to know. Too much had happened, too much time had gone by. They were different people; Harry was a different person. He didn't have the strength to start again. He was still debating when the door opened. Startled hazel eyes met his, and Harry was helpless to look away. "Harry! What're you --?" "I came to see you." "You --" Karl let out a shaky breath. "Why?" And Harry finally found the courage. "I'd like another chance." Karl simply opened the door. * * * "I think you should see him." Harry's eyes snapped from the road to Marton, fingers tightening on the wheel. "Why're you bringing him up?" "Because it's time." "It's too late." Harry concentrated on the road, knuckles white. "It's never too late." "Why do you care?" Marton was silent for a long time. "Because he asked about you." "Too much has happened. You remember what he did." "And you remember what you did." Of course he did. He'd never been able to forget, forget that he'd brought himself down to that level. Still, Marton's words haunted him long into the night. * * * "I can't do this anymore." Harry looked from his newspaper to Karl's bowed head. "Do what anymore?" "This." Karl looked up, napkin clenched tightly in his hand. "We need to end it before we hate each other." Harry's heart froze. "But...we agreed..." Karl gave Harry a tiny smile. "I only agreed for you." "I don't --" Harry cleared his throat, tried again. The emptiness of the space between them loomed large. "I don't want to lose you." Karl tossed his napkin down, stood. The kiss he placed on top of Harry's head was painfully gentle. "You already have," he whispered. * * * Bad idea, this was such a bad idea. Shouldn't've come, shouldn't be here. Home -- good. Needed to be home. Harry stood, swayed, stumbled down the hallway. Needed to find Marton. Marton would take care of him, Marton would get him home to Karl...no, not Karl, Karl was out, Karl was the reason he was here, Karl didn't want him, wanted -- "Steady there, Harry. I've got you." Harry turned into the voice -- warm, low, familiar -- unaware of the tears trailing down his cheeks. "He doesn't want me." "It's alright, Harry. I do." Harry allowed himself to be pulled into the bedroom. * * * "Christ, Harry, would you just drop it?" Karl exclaimed, shoving the door open. Harry followed Karl into the living room, shrugging out of his jacket. "I don't know how you expect me to. You fucking cheated..." "It was one kiss. Just a kiss." "To you, maybe." "You know what, this is stupid," Karl sighed. "I'm going home." He threw his coat back on and fixed Harry with a solemn gaze, as if they'd never shared anything more. "When you're ready to be an adult about this, you know where to find me." The silence mocked long after the door shut. * * * "Our problem is, we never talk to each other anymore." Karl shoved his empty glass along the bar, stared at Lawrence through the mirrored wall's reflection. "He takes me for granted." "If you want my opinion, you take each other for granted." Lawrence shrugged, ordered another round for them. "But that's not a bad thing. You can count on each other." "Can we?" Lawrence met Karl's gaze, noticed the shadows under his eyes, the tight set to his jaw. "Things used to be good, right?" Karl slammed back his beer, and frowned. "Things change, Lawrence. Not always for the better." * * * "We haven't done enough of this lately." Harry glanced down at Karl, bright light from the TV flickering across Karl's face in odd patterns. "Done what?" "Sprawled on the sofa and made out like teenagers." Harry chuckled and played with the ends of Karl's hair as he tried to remember the last time they'd done this. "It's been awhile," he admitted. Karl leaned up and brushed Harry's lips with his own. "Guess we should make up for lost time." Harry smiled, tongue flicking out to tangle briefly with Karl's. "Yeah," he murmured, tightening his grip on Karl's hair. "We should." * * * "Sorry about last night," Karl said, voice a throaty hum in Harry's ear. Harry adjusted the phone, scraped away dried spaghetti sauce with soapy hands. "It's alright. I know you're busy." "I shouldn't be too busy for you." "Things happen." "You're taking this awfully well." Harry smiled, thumb brushing over the handset. "Would you prefer it if I threw a tantrum?" "Yes." Harry's grin widened. "Consider it done." "So -- how's tonight?" "Plans. Tomorrow?" "No good. The weekend, then?" "Yeah, alright. Saturday?" "Whole day off, just for you." "Looking forward to it." And it scared Harry just how much he was. * * * Harry was sure the gods themselves would envy Karl's beauty right now. So fucking hot with his eyes closed, skin flushed, hair tangled. Harry lowered his head, covered Karl's mouth, marveled again at how well they fit, how easily Karl opened up to him. "Beautiful," he murmured, nuzzled Karl's cheek. Karl's laugh turned into a gasp when Harry started to move. "You're only saying...that...cause you're balls deep inside me." Harry grinned, shifted his hips, slid almost completely out before pushing forward. "Not deep enough," he growled. "No." Karl grabbed the back of Harry's head, mouth devouring his a second later. * * * "So?" "Well?" "Tell me." Marton grinned. "How is he?" "Anyone ever tell you that you have no subtlety?" Marton stole Harry's beer and took a sip, winking at him over the bottle. "Yes. So, give over." "None of your business." "Come on. He's a mate. I need the dirt." "Gossip with him, then." Marton leaned comfortably against the kitchen counter. "I might. So, he's good, right?" Harry allowed himself a small smile. "Better." "I knew it!! You're set on him." "Possibly." "Well, love looks good on you." "What makes you think --?" Marton just shook his head. "I know you." * * * "Dinner?" "No, candy bar." Karl held up the wrapper. "See?" "No, I meant dinner. Tonight." "Who's going?" "Just -- uh -- meandyou." "Oh." Karl looked at Harry for an endless moment. "Like, a date?" "Yeah, I guess." "Alright." "What?" Karl smiled and leaned in. His lips were incredibly warm against Harry's neck. "Yes, I'd love to go on a date with you." "Really?" "Mmhmm." Karl's grin lit up his entire face. "Was planning on asking you myself." "Beat you to it, I guess." Karl laughed. "It's not a contest, Harry. We're both winning." Harry returned the smile. "Yes, I guess we are."
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