Jared swears sometimes that he's not friends with Jensen and Chad so much as he's their babysitter or keeper when they run off and do retarded shit that Kane wouldn't be caught dead doing, even during one of his mean drunk spells. "Nothing," Chad answers, but it doesn't have his usual bite. He doesn't sound drunk off his ass, but that doesn't mean much. Chad can hold his liquor better than most alcoholics Jared knows. "I swear, man, don't look at me like that." "Uh huh," Jared says with a snort. Chad's idea of 'nothing' normally involves punches being thrown, so it's not too impressed with the denial. Chad jerks a thumb at Jensen. "He started it." Jensen shoves at Chad's shoulder. "Fuck you, I did not." Jensen, on the other hand, totally sounds like he's tied a few on, sort of slurred, but enunciating each word like that'll help. "You were the one that waded all in and challenging the yokels like you were John fucking Wayne or something," Chad counters, and Jared doesn't need a roadmap or to see in the dark to know that Chad's brows are lowered in agitation. Jensen shoves at Chad's shoulder again. "If you weren't always yapping so goddamn much, I might not need to defend your fucking virtue..." Jared bites back the long-suffering sigh. He knows this argument by heart. Jensen and Chad start off all volatile and acting like they can't stand each other, but Jared knows in about five seconds they'll be settling their bickering the old-fashioned way – with lots of really loud, furniture breaking sex. He really hopes they don't start making out in the back seat like a couple of horny fucking teenagers, all hormones and no sense, but he knows how they operate, and sense isn't a common commodity where the two of them are concerned. Which explains why they're goddamn lucky to have a friend like him to keep tabs on 'em and to make sure they don't wind up in jail or on TMZ.com And, from the way they're looking at each other, it looks like he'll be sleeping in the downstairs bedroom again tonight, just to escape the noise. Jared loves Jensen and Chad like brothers, but there were some paths he never needs to take, and some noises he never needs to hear, especially if it involves his friends and sex. He avoids looking in his rearview mirror as the argument rages on, and punches the gas, hoping against hope he'll get back to the house in time to avoid seeing anything that might give him nightmares for a week.
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